Now that a few days have passed, I understand a bit more clearly where my father was coming from when he said ‘can’t we just have a nice day.’ He was excited to have us over for a visit and he wanted enjoy a good time. No dramatics. Just a quiet enjoyable dinner with his family.
He probably doesn’t understand what the big deal is about having kids, especially since he only had me and what I have been to him is mostly trouble and upset. It must be very difficult for a logical man like my father to have a daughter like me–dramatic, sensitive, super emotional, always ready to launch into an emotional tirade about this or that.
Normally, my father is an incredibly loving man, but perhaps this time, he just didn’t feel like dealing with my issues (trust me, over the years I have had a lot of them.) Maybe for once he wanted things to be easy, pleasant, simple. I can’t say I blame him. Easy, pleasant and simple are words that do not in any way describe me.
I know he meant no harm. Still..I’ll get over it. He’s my Dad. He calls and apologies. A very nice apology. I accept and we make up.
But I meant it when I said this will be the last December I ever experience without a child in my life.