Prepare To Connect To Your Body

Stop hating your curves, dreading your ‘time of the month’ and disliking the shape and size of your breasts. No, they are NOT too big/too small/ too whatever. They are just perfect.

Stop hating the smells that come from your vagina or underarms.

Stop. Just stop.

Its time to start embracing your womanly, feminine body.

This includes your menstrual cycle, your pubic hair, your shapely (or not so shapely) backside.

Start honoring your period. No bad mouthing it, please. It is part of the birth cycle. Stop denying it and suppressing it. Love it and appreciate it.

Your body, in all its amazing womanliness, is trying to do its best for you. Say thank you to it. Give it a big hug. Show some gratitude.

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Prepare To Be Self-Disciplined

Infertility treatments require a lot of self-discipline.

It takes self-discipline not to delve into a box of donuts when you are stressed.

It takes self-discipline to get to the clinic for blood work and ultrasound at 6 a.m.

It takes self-discipline to go to bed early.

It takes self-discipline to keep going to a myofascial release expert or a chiropractor week after week.

It takes self-discipline to remember to buy some walnuts and pumpkin seeds, put them in snack bags and bring them to work to eat during break, instead of grabbing something fast from the vending machine. It takes self-discipline to walk each morning to relieve stress.

Self-discipline means following through on what you start. Self-discipline means getting to your appointments on time. Self-discipline means continuing with treatments and foods that can heal you—even when they are inconvenient and boring. Being self-disciplined will help you stay consistent. It will help you say no when you want to say yes. Or say yes when you wish you could say no.

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Prepare As If You Were A Professional Runner Training For A Race

While going through infertility, consider yourself a runner training for a race. Professional runners are aware that there are many obstacles that can come up during a race and they prepare ahead of time for them.

Successful runners develop the trait of resilience, which gives them the power to bounce back from setbacks. They acknowledge the setback, but quickly move past it so they can focus on the goal ahead.

They know the importance of developing mental toughness and strength so they can continue running, regardless of the conditions, distractions, and emotions they experience during a race.

A successful runner develops the ability to keep moving forward towards their goal, even when there are no immediate signs of winning or even being closer to the finish line. They develop an inner voice that says, ‘I can do this. I have the resources inside of me to succeed.’ They keep running towards their goal, even when the finish line seems impossible to reach. Some runners write positive sayings on their arms or water bottles so they have a motivational thought to carry them through. Some runners keep themselves going by visualizing how it will feel to get to the finish line and win the race.

While going through your infertility treatments, you plan ahead and prepare a strategy to follow even during the rough times. You develop a mental toughness, so you can bounce back from disappointment, whether or not anyone is cheering you on or believes you can win. You follow your plan of action, even when your goal seems elusive or faraway. You keep listening to that positive inner voice that says: ‘yes, you can get pregnant’ even when the finish line is nowhere in sight.

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Prepare to Change the Way You Care for your Body

Healing from infertility requires taking care of your body in a new way that you may have never done before. You may need to entirely change the way you eat, cook and experience food in your life. You may have to change your sleep schedule, exercise routines, and how you use food to cope with emotions and during times of fun and celebration.

You may have to pay closer attention to what you put on your skin, and around your body and in your environment, which can then enter your body. You may have to spend a lot more time preparing foods then you did in the past.

The upside is, not only will you be taking steps to heal your infertility, but you most likely will also start feeling healthier in every other way too.

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Prepare to receive

Becoming pregnant is, in part, an act of receiving. Being open to conceiving a baby is the act of receiving a precious gift—a gift you very much deserve.

So starting now, get yourself in the habit of receiving.
Make receiving something you feel very comfortable with. Buy yourself small gifts every week, so that receiving becomes something you get used to.

Write down all the good things you’ve received in your life, things you willingly allowed yourself to receive, things that came to you just because you are a human and good things can sometimes flow to us if we allow ourselves to receive it.
Think of all the things you easily and freely receive in your life, such as air, gravity, sunshine, and a womb where your child can grow.

Wrap small presents and give them to yourself as a reminder that you, as a human being on this earth, have a right to receive good things.

Remember: you don’t need to be perfect to receive good things.

You can be flawed, imperfect, and still be worthy of receiving good things.

Sometimes you will receive good things just because.

Sometimes you will receive good things because you worked hard for them.

Sit outside and allow yourself to receive the warmth of the sun. Sit under a tree and let yourself receive its cooling shade. Sit by the ocean and let yourself receive the calming sound of the waves.

Each week, take note of all the wonderful things you received that week–from a text that brightened your day, to a hug or kiss, to a good night’s sleep, to a glimpse of something unexpected that just made you happy.

Let the emotion and experience of receiving begin to feel natural to

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Prepare to Banish the ‘No-You-Don’t-Deserve-That Monster’ Who May Lurk In Your Subconscious

Inside many of us, there lives a little no monster who is always telling us ‘no’.

The little no-monster wants to punish and deny us.

The little no-monster will say, ‘no, you can’t have that!’ ‘no you can’t do that!’ ‘no you don’t deserve that!’ ‘no someone like you will never get that!’

If you are going to harness all your power to make a baby, you need to set the ‘no-monster’ straight right from the beginning, and let it know ‘yes, I can have a baby’ ‘yes, I deserve a baby’ ‘yes, I am capable of giving birth.’

Tell the no-monster ‘yes I can get pregnant’, ‘yes my body is strong enough to conceive a child and hold it safely for nine months’, ‘yes someone like me will have a baby’ ‘yes, I deserve this to work out.’

The no-monster will remind you of all the times in your life you tried and failed. It will remind you of all the times you really, really wanted something and you failed to get it. It will remind you of all the things you didn’t achieve and all the people who hurt you. It will say over and over again that you are not the kind of person who ever gets what you want. It will tell you that you are a failure. It will tell you that woman with your type of personality/childhood/family history/experiences/ can’t do this.

You need to tell the no-monster to SHUT UP AND GO AWAY!

You need to squash that voice, argue it away, and put your inner yes master to work.

Because inside you also lives a ‘yes master.’ The ‘yes master’ believes in you and knows you can win. This ‘yes master’ knows very well that you are very capable of having a baby.

Allow this ‘yes master’ to scream right out loud that yes, you deserve a baby. Yes, you will get what you want. Yes, you can achieve what you set out to achieve. The yes-master will remind you of all those times in your life when you worked hard and achieved your goal.

It will remind you that miracles happen everyday, and people who never imagined they could get pregnant somehow end up having beautiful babies.

It will remind you that although your road may be long and hard, you can still reach your destination. The ‘yes master’ will encourage you to never give up. It will help you tap into the strong, courageous part of you who is able to step up to the plate and do whatever it takes to win.

Let the ‘yes-master’ be your friend through this ordeal, and tell the ‘no- monster’ to shove off.

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Prepare For The Hard times By Creating Happiness Zones in Your Life

You need from the very start of your infertility journey to create happiness zones that will give you some comfort and joy when the going gets tough.

A happiness zone is anything that nudges you gently over to a road of happiness, and shields you, even for a few minutes, from feelings of sadness, anxiety, anger and nervousness. A happiness zone can be a place you love to visit, time spent with a person who always leaves you feeling happy, a favorite picture, a game, hobby or a pet.

The more happiness zones you create in your life, the easier the hard times will be to endure. A happiness zone can be a weekly date with a friend, a singing or acting class, a knitting group, a book club, buying yourself flowers every Tuesday, taking yourself to a weekly picnic, or buying a fish tank, a cat or a plant.

Set up routines so you have pleasant experiences to look forward to each week. Is there a beautiful park nearby that you can take a walk at once a week? A place in your yard you can sit 15 minutes a day and enjoy the sunshine?

Have videos, music and books readily available that make you laugh and feel positive. Surround yourself with music that transport you back to happy times in your life.

Ask yourself: what makes me happy? Include these in your life more often! What can you do to make breakfast more enjoyable? Your drive to work? Your lunch hour or break time? Evenings at home? Saturday mornings?

Break it down by the hour if you have to—what would elevate your feelings of joy? It can be anything, from taking out your collection of childhood teddy bears and displaying them in the living room, to doing karaoke once a week with a new group of friends, to reading a chapter of the Bible daily.

Think about what made you happy when you were a child, a teenager and a young adult. Get ready to tap into the most ancient parts of yourself and start including those long-forgotten activities in your life.

In whatever ways you can, add fun and comfort to your home, your routines, and your life. These will lift you up as you walk this road.

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